Consider me in charge.<\/p>\n
It\u2019s not a glamorous team. I don\u2019t recall ever managing a team in Germany which begs the question of why they\u2019d hire me, but I\u2019m not here to ask questions. From the Champions league winning team, Paul Lambert has left and gone back to Scotland, with Celtic to be precise. Was he really the key component in this team? Scott Booth has arrived from Aberdeen, I\u2019m not really sure why. Maybe Dortmund have a strict one Scot only policy? Who knows. Sammer is wanted by Barcelona but that\u2019s just tough, I need him.<\/p>\n \u00a35m is not enough to retain the Champions League. I\u2019m beginning to see where the cracks came in. Fortunately this soon increases with season ticket sales to over \u00a310m<\/p>\n What the ruddy hell is this!?<\/p>\n Some sort of fancy pre-season I assume. We\u2019ll just play it and hope.<\/p>\n Penalty shootouts in Germany could go on forever. Well it was really<\/em> worth it.<\/p>\n Anyway, regardless of the team, it\u2019s important to do the basics. Marc Emmers signs for \u00a3400k.<\/p>\n Oh it\u2019s time for another one of these.<\/p>\n After the early shoddiness from the Scott (pun intended) and the American, my German contingent do what they do best to see us through.<\/p>\n Well that sounds like a treat. Some versatility is signed.<\/p>\n I\u2019ll be amazed if we get to pens against Bayern!<\/p>\n Yes, that went as well as expected. They\u2019re just so much better than we are\u2026<\/p>\n This might help:<\/p>\n It\u2019s a canny tragic start to our league season.<\/p>\n Then again, Bayern lose at Rostock so maybe it\u2019s just one of those weekends.<\/p>\n Sib\u2019s here, that\u2019ll help.<\/p>\n Another cup is here. Presumably the cup that matters. We\u2019re through anyway.<\/p>\n Spare a thought for Tennis Borussia Berlin. That is just a collection of words.<\/p>\n Heh. Lube.<\/p>\n Time to try and get our first league win but we\u2019re up against everybody\u2019s favourite pyjama wearing Hungarian<\/p>\n \u2026who we can\u2019t beat.<\/p>\n I\u2019m starting to think this wasn\u2019t such a brilliant idea after all.<\/p>\n As you can see, it\u2019s another white hot day of Bundesliga action.<\/p>\n Champions League groups have been drawn, I think Hitzfeld had the right idea.<\/p>\n Anyway, that\u2019s to look forward to later. Third time lucky in the league:<\/p>\n Goals are going to be a problem I fear. Just when I think we\u2019ve turned a corner, this goes sour very quickly.<\/p>\n I\u2019m tempted by this:<\/p>\n Sammer being a sweeper or defensive midfielder limits him in my team, Abelardo could really shore us up.<\/p>\n Well there we go then.<\/p>\n More liquid football here but at least the new man gets man of the match on debut.<\/p>\n Our first Champions League game is here and we\u2019ve got literally our easiest of the 6 games up first. It\u2019s all downhill from here.<\/p>\n Steffen is our Freund. I\u2019m calling this early but Kirovski is absolutely terrible. Here we are thrashing an amateur side 1-0.<\/p>\n It\u2019s fair to say we underperformed!<\/p>\n Round 3 will be a real treat.<\/p>\n Haters gonna hate though, the German entertainers have won 3 games in a week and conceded nothing. We are Alan Hansen\u2019s wet dream.<\/p>\n I\u2019ve moved to solve our goal scoring problems though. Meet my new striker.<\/p>\n 5 years before he was scoring hat tricks for Bolton, Fredi Bobic was (probably) a much sought after striker in the Bundesliga. Granted he can\u2019t help me in Europe due to being ineligible, but that doesn\u2019t worry me. As fate would dictate, Bobic\u2019s debut comes at the club he left 2 days ago.<\/p>\n Nerves of steel this lad. That and he\u2019s German so missing a penalty wasn\u2019t an option. The old BB gun strike force. The old Bobic & Boothy. B&B coming at ya. We\u2019ll work on the name, it\u2019s not important.<\/p>\n Listen, get to f*ck. You might have won the Champions League but you\u2019ve got Scott Booth up front. I\u2019m doing the best I can!<\/p>\n Speaking of Boothy, we\u2019re off to his homeland. He celebrates by popping up with a priceless equaliser.<\/p>\n Can\u2019t help but feel we probably needed to win that if we\u2019re going to get through ahead of Barcelona.<\/p>\n Annoyingly, the day after this result Brian Laudrup leaves Rangers to sign for Bayern Munich.<\/p>\n This is a decent result too.<\/p>\n Side note on Chapuisat, one of my earliest football game memories is the Euro 96 game for the PC. Barry Davies did commentary and he really shouted Chapuisat with some gusto. Story over.<\/p>\n He is turning into my favourite Swiss man though.<\/p>\n See how we turned on the style and scored a second goal. Wow.<\/p>\n I mean look at the table. Are you not entertained!?<\/p>\n All I\u2019m saying is, I can understand how they only finished 10th<\/sup>. This isn\u2019t a bad result but it was close to being magnificent.<\/p>\n Scott Booth, you dog. We really needed to win though; it\u2019s looking grim with only 1st<\/sup> place guaranteed to advance.<\/p>\n From one extreme to another and we actually manage to put lower league opposition to the sword.<\/p>\n It\u2019s not the worst quarter final draw either.<\/p>\n I\u2019m sure we can thrash them 1-0. Bayern away now. Have we improved since that weird cup game?<\/p>\n Right. What irritates me here is that Kahn fouled Sibierski for the pen and wasn\u2019t even booked. Bobic scored the pen and it had to be re-taken\u2026then Kahn saved it. Big Oliver went on to get man of the match. Denied a famous win but it\u2019s a moral victory.<\/p>\n Ridiculously, our next game goes ahead despite Emmers, Chapuisat & Booth all playing for their respective countries in World Cup playoff matches. Fortunately, Sibi gets the job done despite having to watch Kirovski miss about 15 chances!<\/p>\n Big game in Minsk next and the main men are back in the side. Sibi is banned though and Moller is still injured so we need to find some creativity somewhere. I needn\u2019t have worried.<\/p>\n It\u2019s not impossible but with our last game nigh on impossible, we\u2019re looking to sneak a second place finish.<\/p>\n This is however getting silly now. Barry Davies would have been all over this.<\/p>\n I mean, he\u2019s not even that good. 6 for shooting!<\/p>\n To be fair, he did score pretty much 1 in 2 during his time at Dortmund so why his best stats are determination and tackling, I dread to think.<\/p>\n This guy will never amount to much.<\/p>\n There\u2019s chaos in the World Cup playoff match.<\/p>\n Controversy just follows Beckham around it seems. Stuart Pearce back in the side is a big call.<\/p>\n Sibierski has been a real bargain.<\/p>\n That puts us up to 2nd<\/sup>, remarkably. Borussia MGB top the pile.<\/p>\n The big clash with Rangers is here, and not only is Bobic ineligible, Booth is suspended and Moller injured. That\u2019s less than ideal.<\/p>\n Not to worry, Kirovski is here!<\/p>\n With Barca beating Minsk fairly routinely, we\u2019re up against it with that big clash at the Nou Camp to come.<\/p>\n Another home win too but a stupid red card spoils our day.<\/p>\n It\u2019s even made the board moderately pleased!<\/p>\n World Club Cup time, something Dortmund won against Cruzeiro and I\u2019d like to do the same. It\u2019s Sao Paulo for us though. The squad is chaotic \u2013 most of the players I\u2019ve signed are ineligible and there\u2019s injuries and suspensions ahoy too.<\/p>\n Sao Paulo have Denilson but we\u2019re German, so when it comes to penalties it\u2019s routine.<\/p>\n![\"1\"](\"https:\/\/thehighertempopress.files.wordpress.com\/2015\/10\/110.png\")
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